There and Back Again

The air was thick with fog when Tess took Justin and I down from holiday celebrations on Glade Park to the train station in Grand Junction. Snow had been falling for a couple of days on and off, but as we descended into the cold air trapped below there was sunshine illumination the red and white sandstone walls of the Colorado National Monument.

I wrote that because I can remember it as a stark and clear vision of what was. Once we descended into the fog things are less clear in my mind. Only little vignettes largely consisting of sights passing by quickly and conversations that aren’t quite complete. The fog stayed with us as we climbed slowly up and over the rockies; until the dark descended.

We ended our journey out to Englewood by taking the RTA light rail, which was bright and sterile in the way of high school hallways and hospitals, to a dingy extended stay hotel off the side of I-25. I know that the TV was on for a while after we settled in the hotel, but I couldn’t tell you what was on. More fog.

The following morning, the day of my visit to Swedish hospital, was sunny and cold. I waited in bed and futzed around the little kitchenette for hours while Justin slept. Later, when both of us were up and moving around, we took the train back north a bit and found a bagel shop that served kosher breakfasts.

We slipped into this morning, not really going anywhere or doing anything special and effectively wasting time until we returned to the hotel room and headed out on a walk to Swedish. Apple maps routed us along East Hampden road which has no side walks. I know that Justin and I spent the hour and then some talking, but again much of this is lost with the angry traffic growling its way past the two of us picking our way through weeds and road detritus. I know we discussed bike touring and maybe his girlfriend.

At the hospital the new doctor asked me all the usual questions, got my history, had me push and pull and touch my nose. In the end nothing new from this visit, but a video EEG is being scheduled and an MRI. I don’t think he really offered branch of hope to me, but at least he was compassionate. Besides, I don’t think there was much he could tell from the exam or the history beyond that something was wrong.

Prudential can go suck it! One thing I do recall was that Livsey said it was premature for any diagnosis. When he talked about the video EEG he said that this was the only way to conclusively confirm PNES and even it wasn’t fool proof. Much like Barnhart he was skeptical of the diagnosis because of the response I’ve had to Epitol. He talked to me about a number of potential issues that have been glossed over previously including plague vaccine, head injury, and even general anesthesia.

Eventually we left the office and my cousin Chad was in town visiting his friend. He was nice enough to come and get us from the hospital and then drive everyone back to their respective residences.

Next I need to schedule the video EEG which will be a four days to a week and then figure out how I’m going to get there and back again.

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